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Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Horny mallu

India is a horny country
No pun intended
today was no Horn day in Kerala
The Indian Medical association Cochin celebrated this by spreading awareness on noise pollution 
but
let me talk of the addiction of the mallu to his horn !
hes born with a finger on this button and all his emotions are expressed singularly by horning
his horny moments are plenty
The angry horn : this usually comes when he is overtaken ,or a pedestrian or cow or auto or cycle blocks his way ,this comes in starts and is sudden and loud
The frustrated horn : when there is a traffic block and Mallu is in a hurry which is usually all the time ,he just horns in fits and starts
the emotional horn : can happen with no cause as it arises from within and not from outside ,ususally when he fights with wifey in car or by his mobile phone he expresses his displeasure by horning
The joyful horn happen when mallu is cheerful this usually is long and low and one can feel the cheer
The lazy horn happens with no reason but mallu laziness in having to drive to work on a Monday after the weekend slosh
the hartal horn is risky one as it makes his vehicle a prime target for stones expect in two wheeler which the proleterait knows isn't feudal
The VIP horn is only for strutting politicians with real horns to announce their presence to the commoners
The holy horn is generally from church or temple goers who are late for the mass or pujas
The school horn happens from harried fathers and mothers going to drop their children in school
The Goondah horn is one of fury its usually followed by stopping vehicle and creating mayhem
The surprise horn is by funsters who love creating a start on the humble jay walker its done with stealth and smiles
so with all this addictions the mallu cannot live with his horns of course he will whenever he goes to Gulp
there he is never horny for they will circumcise his horns for good

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